Blurr
by Call Me Trouble
Summary: Oneshots about Blurr. Rated T for adult themes. First fic. G1 UNDER EDITING
1. Angsty Blurr

**Disclaimer: **Don't own.

**Warning: **Character death. Sort of.

**Author's Note: **Oneshots for Blurr. Haven't done any creative writng since school and don't think that counts. I hope they'll improve with time. Requests and suggestions taken. Also posted on Deviant Art. Same author name just hyphonated.

--**Angsty Blurr**

It felt like it should hurt. Why didn't it hurt? One moment he was running around firing on the decepticons, the next he was flying through the air. Ground, sky, energon, limbs, a dizzying kaleidoscope of colour and dust. Now he was lying there wondering what had happened and when the pain would come. He could feel nothing but the absence of agony, it was strange. Diagnostics were unresponsive but then so was everything else. This didn't particularly worry him. The sounds of battle had faded to a distant hum and from his current position face down on the ground he had a truly scintillating view of the grass. His vision was pixilating at the edges still he could see the energon spreading beneath him. He'd always known he would die alone though he'd never expected this. He was supposed to go out in one quick shot as he raced to his destination or maybe he would have been caught and tortured and killed for refusing to talk. This was just disappointing and sad. No blaze of glory, no missing presumed dead. They wouldn't find his broken body in a ditch. He wouldn't be strung up as an example for the world to see. Instead he would die as countless others before him. On the battlefield ignored by friend and foe alike as his life ebbed away and his vision grew dark. It was never supposed to be this way.


	2. Tortured Blurr

**Disclaimer: **My room floods when it rains or someone has a bath. I don't own Transformers.

**Warning: **Suggestion of torture. Nothing graphic.

**Author's Note: **It's longer and there's a hint of dialogue. Yay me.

--

Cyclonus was worried. If he didn't succeed Megatron would take it out on him, but this time he didn't think he would succeed. Oh, he knew that given enough time the mech would crack and tell everything, his techniques always worked in the end. Unfortunately he was going to crack first he knew it.

"SothenhermalecreatorwalksinI'veneverbeensoterrifiedinmylifeimeanicouldtrytoexplainbutyouknowitsobviousheain'..."

It's been going on like this for hours. He tortures mech, tells the mech to spill and by Primus does the mech spill. They've got past early childhood now and Cyclonus is absolutely certain that the mech is never going to make it to legally adult. No, Cyclonus will kill him long before that.

Blurr babbled away watching the irritation grow on the decepticons face and fought down a smirk. This always worked. Usually it just got him beat up worse but this time there was no need to worry. The information he had was important, important enough that the autobots would come for him. They couldn't afford to let it fall into the wrong hands, so he dragged up the worst stories he could remember and wondered when the decepticon would crack.

Next day...

The autobots were here. Cyclonus was out of time. They needed the information and there was only one way to get it. He didn't want to, a forced bond would hurt him just as much as the mech but Megatron would hurt him worse. He forced the mech's head down and plugged himself in.

'Slag' was Blurr's one thought on the subject. It had never occurred to him the decepticon would try this. He must have realised the information was vital when the autobots attacked. He could feel him punching away at his firewalls and could only hope the autobots would get in before they fell.

The mech's firewalls fell and Cyclonus felt the sweet thrill of triumph before he was overwhelmed with the mech's consciousness. Primus, what was this? Normally a mech''s consciousness would be laid out before him all he had to do was choose the right path. This, this was madness. Codes and colours swept by him so fast he barely had time to comprehend they were there when they were gone.

Blurr giggled happily as the decepticon crashed to the floor thrashing madly. He couldn't wait to tell the others he'd crashed the con's logic centre without even trying. Judging by the sounds of battle he shouldn't have to wait too long either. Smirking to himself he settled in to wait.


	3. Frustrated Blurr

**Disclaimer:** Me no owny.

**Warning: **Masturbation

--

Frustration.

That summed up Blurr's feelings perfectly. Complete. Utter. Frustration. He was back from his mission run with no plans for the morrow and horny as hell. It was four in the morning. Everyone, EVERYONE, was on shift or in recharge. Fortunately he had a back up plan. He returned to his quarters, locked the door and reached into his subspace. The object he withdrew was pink, smooth and heaven sent. He just hoped to Primus the battery was charged. He flicked the on switch and grinned as the motor hummed to life. He ran it over his chassis sighing in relief as the vibrations soothed his circuits. He pushed it into his most intimate areas until he felt his overload build up inside and spill over with a cry of delight. When he could function again, he calmly subspaced the object and drifted into contented recharge. Who said the humans couldn't invent something useful.

--

Does no one else see giant alien robots with sex toys. Cos seriously I think it makes sense. This wasn't where I planned to be and it's short again but I'm having fun so what the hey. I also think it lost something in my efforts not to be explicit. Is the rating suitable BTW?


	4. Blurr: The Morning After

**Disclaimer: **Not mine.

**Warning: **Drunken behaviour and drool (I doubt mechs can drool but I wanted drool and it appeared.)

**Author's Note:** I like this one. I had to completely rewrite it to get it that way, but all's well that ends well.

--

Blurr woke up slowly. He knew as soon as his processor onlined that this was a mistake. His head _hurt. _He wanted to fall back into recharge but this was no longer possible. There was a heavy weight on his chest and something wet and sticky dribbling down inside his collar ridge. He wondered if he dared switch on his optics, he knew there was no way he would like what he saw. He was right. The room was spinning. Blurr wasn't prone to dizziness, the speeds he reached would have made that a serious drawback, but the world was certainly revolving now. When he felt he could control his nausea he looked down at his chest. He had been right, he hadn't wanted to know. Hotrod was sprawled over the upper half of his chassis with his legs hanging over the berth and he was _drooling. _Long, sticky trails coming out of his mouth onto Blurr's chest then trickling down inside his armour. That was too much for Blurr. He rolled off the berth, taking Hotrod with him and purged his tanks onto the floor. Hotrod had woken with the fall and was demanding to know what had happened but Blurr ignored him. His memory banks had decided to make themselves known and were helpfully supplying him with snippets of the previous night. Oh Primus, no. He hadn't been that overcharged surely. He remembered dancing on the table with Hoist of all mechs. He remembered Blaster cheering them on. He couldn't remember when he had started drinking or indeed, why. Unfortunately he could remember Hoist coming onto him after their dance and Blurr trying to explain that he didn't want to leave with him. It wasn't Hoist's fault, Blurr was quite certain by that point no one could have understood a word he was saying. So Hotrod decided to rescue him. He remembered it clearly and had the horrible feeling everyone else would too. Hotrod had charged him, screaming a war cry, slung him over his shoulder and fled from the room howling "**_DEATH BEFORE DISHONOUR_**_." _Blurr's last memory was of Hotrod stumbling down the hallway using Blurr as a shield as he bounced off the walls.


	5. Confused Blurr

**Disclaimer: **Not mine

**Author's Note: **This popped into my head while I was working out a different scenario. That one's written as well but I wanna play with it a bit more so you get this instead. :-)

--

Optimus peered out from behind his rocks. This battle was not going well, they were losing badly. It had been a simple enough plan. Optimus would attack from the front and Prowl would circle around behind. No one had counted on Soundwave. All frequencies were jammed, absolutely no signals could get through, so Optimus and Prowl were fighting blind. The melee fighters were getting the worst of it, something had to be done.

"Blurr" called Optimus, flinching slightly as he appeared almost instantly. "I need you to run over there and tell Prowl to retreat." "Overthere!Youmeanacrossthebattleovertherethroughallthefightingandgunfireandexplosionsoverthere?"

"Blurr, we don't have time for this. I have the utmost faith in you. Now jump over this rock and run like slag or I will throw you over the rock and you'll have to run like slag."

Blurr didn't need telling twice. He jumped over the rock and ran like slag. He hadn't gone far however when he was caught in some kind of explosion. He was knocked off his feet and landed slightly stunned, but unharmed nearly 200 feet away. Unable to believe his good fortune, he stared in shocked silence into the wide red optics of the decepticon he'd landed on. Realising his landing pad was sentient he jumped up, apologising profusely, pulled the decepticon to his feet and gave him back his weapon. He was still trailing apologies as he cleared Prowl's defensive line, and it was only then that it occurred to him just what he had done.

--

I have reviews! Thank you muchly. (Happy dance)

Special thanks to Norielit for the advice which I've tried to implement here. 

Apologies for the misspelt shield which I've since fixed. It was two in the morning and I couldn't work out how to edit. (sheepish grin)

So thanks to everyone who's reading this I hope you continue to enjoy.


	6. Blurr: Training

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Transformers.

**Author's Note:** I sympathise with Ironhide here. The ending wrote itself, totally ran away from me. Thanks again for the reviews.

--

"Good then. We're practising hand to hand fighting under less then ideal conditions. Your optics are disabled so you have to track your opponent with scanners and audios only and to make it harder I'm playing white noise through the speakers. Do both of you understand?"

Ironhide waited while the two mechs confirmed then continued "This time I want you both to concentrate on footwork. That means you Blurr, have to keep it slow enough for me to see."

"I know that. You've told me five times already. Why does everyone assume I have to go fast all the time,IcangoslowifIwantto."

"So why don't you?" chipped in Wheeljack. "We sure would appreciate it sometimes."

"WhyshouldI,huh?Blurrslowdown,Blurrcalmdown,Blurr be quiet. Sometimes you annoy me too,butdoImentionit?NoIdon't. Why don'tyoustopblowingthingsup?"

"Enough." cut in Ironhide. "Ready. Three. Two. One. Begin."

The room was instantly filled with static. Still a bit put out by the 'slow down' comment, Blurr aimed a swift side kick to where Wheeljack's head had been. He had the brief satisfaction of connecting with something before his leg was grabbed and his feet swept out from under him. Picking himself up, he checked his scanners. Wheeljack had backed up and was shifting slightly from side to side waiting for another opening. Blurr proceeded to circle him warily, aiming a punch here and there but mainly looking for his next move.

Wheeljack made his first. He advanced, blocking Blurr's blows and crowding him so he didn't have room to swing. Then he grabbed him round the waist, hoisted him overhead and threw him against the wall. Blurr bounced off, rolled, regained his footing and decided he'd had about enough of that. Wheeljack who had advanced again was rather taken aback by the sudden flurry of punches and kicks and backed up trying to create some distance between them. Blurr didn't think distance was such a great idea, he didn't want Wheeljack to come up with another brilliant way to throw him into something. So he kept up his assault. Wheeljack threw caution to the wind and himself at Blurr and rugby tackled him to the ground.

Ironhide wondered from the safety of the viewing platform, why exactly he bothered. He tried his best to train the mechs to be better fighters and what happened? His carefully planned training sessions degenerated into this. A pair of fully grown mechs rolling around on the floor flailing at each other like sparklings. He swore if they came crying to him afterwards about a dented knee, he would not be held responsible for his actions.


	7. Drugged Blurr

**Author's Note: **Terry Pratchett said that writing was the most fun anyone could have by themselves. I always assumed he was joking. I wasn't going to post this today but my manager let me leave early. All hail manager K!

--

"Raaaatchet?"

"No."

"But..."

"No"

"Please?"

"Sideswipe, he's not that fragging loud! Just ignore him."

"He's irritating. Look at him."

Ratchet powered down his optics, gathered up his patience and looked. Blurr was exactly as he left him. Flat on his back, drugged to the optics, humming and occasionally giggling. Creepily. Sometimes he broke off from the humming, not the giggling, to have important discussions with the monitors. During these he would wave his arms around frantically while kicking the wall as a sort of punctuation mark.

"Just deactivate his vocaliser then. Let me suffer in peace."

"I'll deactivate your vocaliser if you don't shut up."

Ratchet turned back to Powerglide ignoring the mutinous muttering, off key humming and a particularly shrill giggle which nearly offlined his audios. Contrary to belief Ratchet did, when he felt like it, have a large reserve of patience.

It was tested. Blurr began to sing. Sideswipe began to bang his head off the table. Ratchet remained serene. He maintained his Buddha-like zen right up until Blurr blasted the chorus.

"Iiii'm aaaa Hiiiighwaaaay Staaaaaar!"

Sideswipe whimpered and covered his audios. Ratchet screamed.

Everyone who later watched the recording agreed not even Blurr could have kept up with Ratchet. From a standing start he cleared three tables, complete with patients in his desperation to end the terrible screeching.

--

_Nobody gonna beat my car. It's gonna break the speed of sound. _**Highway Star, Deep Purple**

**Disclaimer: **I own neither Transformers nor Deep Purple.


	8. Exasperated Blurr

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

**Warning: **Simulated sex.

**Author's Note: **I'm stuck on the next one. Well and truly stuck. Enjoy.

--

It started as it always did. Slight noises intruding on his consciousness. Slowly, reluctantly, Blurr was forced out of recharge. He groaned loudly. Nosecone and Jetfire were at it again. The groans, clanks and bangs drifting through the wall like it wasn't even there.

"Do you think I'd fit in the cupboard?" Bumblebee sounded slightly wistful.

Blurr glared at the cupboard in question. "Maybe. But what about me,huh?WhatamIsupposedtodo?"

"Ignore it?" Bumblebee didn't sound like he thought much of this suggestion.

Blurr winced as his neighbours howled in union, then blissful silence fell.

"Well, that wasn't too bad." Bumblebee, the eternal optimist.

"It'sbeengoingonforweeks,Ican'ttakeitanymore!"

Before Bumblebee could ask what he meant, Blurr slammed back into the adjoining wall.

"Yeeeesssssss!" He howled sexily.

Bumblebee stared, optics wide. Then he grinned evilly, jumped onto Blurr's berth, pushed him back into the wall and yelled "There, Primus please. Right there!"

Blurr bounced on the berth, grinning like a loon, groaning and shouting encouraging nonsense. Bumblebee echoed him, 'til finally they decided it had gone on long enough. Each screamed the others name and collapsed, desperately trying not to giggle.

--

Thank you for the lovely reviews.

**Norielit: **(Looks around shiftily.) Um...er...Politics? (Blinks, sidles away.)

**Thing With No Talent :** LOL! Fantastic line!


	9. Lost Blurr

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Transformers.

**Author's Note: **OK, this chapter was bloody hard. Took me three days and god knows how many rewrites. Oh, the irony. Enjoy.

--

They were lost. Utterly, irrevocably, lost. Blurr knew this. Had indeed spent all yesterday telling them so. Until Sandstorm had snapped, got him in a headlock and told him to _shut the frag up. _Not even Ultra Magnus had stepped in to split them up. Since then Blurr had remained silent. He knew himself well enough, if he opened his mouth he would only start the whole thing again and this time he suspected everyone would step in. On Sandstorm's side. So he said nothing. But they were lost whether he said it or not.

They'd been investigating decepticon activity in the area when they'd picked up strange energy from this planetoid. The surface was dead and the energy readings were coming from underground. Sky Lynx had circled 'til he'd spotted a cave opening of sorts. Unfortunately Sky Lynx was too big to fit through the opening so Ultra Magnus had told him to stay behind while the rest of them, Sandstorm, Blurr, Nightbeat and Ultra Magnus investigated the energy readings. That was two days ago.

At first there hadn't been a problem. Blurr wasn't a fan of enclosed spaces but he hadn't expected to be down here long. Follow scanners to energy source, investigate energy source, decide what to do about energy source. Simple.

Their scanners had stopped working. Not early on. No. That would have been too kind. They were several miles under, round more twist and turns and intersections than Blurr could count. They were lost. Blurr thought he was to be commended. He hadn't said anything, hadn't panicked. Had quietly listened to Ultra Magnus' plan to retrace their steps and done his best to do just that. But they'd come too far. None could remember whether they had turned left or right, come down this road or that, so slowly, quietly, they got more and more lost.

They'd walked through the night. When their chronometers told them they'd been down there for twenty four hours Ultra Magnus had stopped and asked for suggestions. Sky Lynx couldn't help them. They'd lost comms with him when their scanners went out. It was down to them. No one had any ideas. So they'd continued their hopeless wandering. It wasn't long after this that Blurr had started babbling. He knew it was annoying. Knew the others didn't want to hear how bad their situation was, but he couldn't help himself. Babbling calmed him down.

Now, one day after the Sandstorm incident, he was trailing along after them feeling sorry for himself. No one was talking, everyone was dwelling on their own fate, when they heard it. Sky Lynx!

"Hellooooooo!"

It took them several tries to find him. They were yelling too much to track the sounds properly. Eventually they found the right route and came spilling out laughing, not sobbing, no, definitely not sobbing, and latched themselves onto Sky Lynx's legs. It took several minutes for him to dislodge them and far, far longer to find out what had happened and he certainly didn't find out from Blurr. Deeming the babbling ban lifted, Blurr happily chatted away a mile a minute. Nobody really wanted to shut him up. Though half an hour after they'd left the planetoid behind they were starting to change their minds.


	10. Vengeful Blurr

**Disclaimer:** I do not own transformers or teletubbies

**Author's Note: **A head's up. I've been updating this nearly daily and I expect that to slow down round about now. The honeymoon is over. I'm finding it harder to come up with these. So , I appreciate everyone who's reading this and don't worry there's no end in sight. Just gonna take a bit longer is all.

--

Blurr zipped down the hallway. He was on a special mission and no one would ever suspect it was him. There'd been a big battle the day before which the autobots had won, so of course they'd had to celebrate. Blurr had seen his chance. He'd acted ridiculously overcharged, making sure he was seen, before he'd finally staggered out, not too early and not too late, singing _that _song about the Supreme and the Mini-Bot. Everyone would assume he was passed out in his quarters along with most of the base. 

Now he was dashing through the Ark stopping here and there for a minute or two before swiftly moving on. Blurr had to hurry. He wanted to be tucked up innocently in his recharge berth before things kicked off. Tomorrow would be interesting. He'd have to miss the very beginning to maintain his innocent appearance, but he could always get recordings later.

The next morning the Ark had a rather rude awakening. Too early for comfort an awful noise came through the PA system. It was later identified as the Teletubbies theme tune although the bot who identified it refused to be named. Upon crowding the hallways they discovered that every inch of camera blind spot had been covered in intricate drawings. Mostly of officers in compromising positions. The rec. room was a wreck largely because of the party, but it was the television which drew the most horrified gasps. Teletubby episodes back to back. Most problems went unnoticed at first. The washracks only spat fire retardant foam. The training drones fired pink paint. The list went on. However, very few bot's had been touched.

Blurr passed unnoticed through the chaos, occasionally his face would twitch, like a grin passing too fast to be seen. It was particularly noticeable as the twins were dragged, screaming their innocence to the brig. They never should have painted him green.


	11. Horny Blurr: Request

**Disclaimer:** I own Transformers not.

**Warning: **Alien robot slash

**Author's Note: **fuzzball3193 you asked for horny Blurr. I've tried my best and um no to the Star Trek question. I am drunk and have drunk far too much Red Bull. I'm reasonably certain that the laptop is closer than it appears and I wish it would sit still. Oh Well. Enjoy.

--

Windcharger growled as he shoved Blurr back into the room. He'd been driving him wild all through the meeting. Touching him lightly, making sure no one saw, just quietly driving him insane. As soon as the meeting was over he'd dragged Blurr to his quarters to finish what he'd started.

Blurr grinned as his back hit the berth. He jumped up, pulling Windcharger with him. He pushed him onto his back and ran his hands down his chassis tweaking sensitive wires. Windcharger groaned and pulled Blurr down to kiss him roughly. Reaching through gaps in his armour to rub at his interface port.

Fans whirring their interface cables emerged and snaked towards the other's port. Once connected they continued stroking each others circuits working their way slowly up to the spark casing. Moaning, sighing, each murmuring nonsense words, their sparks joined. For one glorious moment they were as one. Coming down from the overload, Windcharger snuggled up to Blurr.

"Next time you want a frag, just ask. Don't touch me up in front of the Prime."

"Youloveditreally."

Windcharger was going to kill him. After he woke up.


	12. Damaged Blurr

**Disclaimer: **Know it? I don't own it.

**Warning: **Allusions to rape. Nothing graphic.

**Author's Note: **Jazz's angst. Let me show you it.

--

Jazz was watching Blurr. It was something he did sometimes when he thought the blue bot wouldn't notice. Blurr was always babbling on too fast too understand and he never stood still for long. So Jazz had to wonder. Were the twitchiness and the babbling part of Blurr's original programming or something else.

It was something Jazz thought about often when he was in a melancholy mood. Was Red Alert always so paranoid? Did Ratchet always threaten his patients with terrible deaths? He wondered about them too. Others.

Because you see, Jazz could see no change in himself. He'd been fighting this war Primus knew how long and still he was the same old Jazz. But he wondered. Had he changed and just not noticed? If he was to go back home, walk long forgotten streets, meet long forgotten friends. Would they recognise him? Would they pass him by? Some monster they knew not.

The war had come and it had destroyed everything and Jazz couldn't believe that he had escaped unscathed. He simply couldn't fathom that he had seen and done so much and still was Jazz. So he watched the others. He saw their flaws and wondered if they were always there.

Blurr was his favourite subject. Because he had been there when the war got Blurr in its clutches and he had seen the damage done. 

They'd found him in a city the decepticons had destroyed. They were looking for salvage, not survivors. Any living had run while they could. But they'd found Blurr. In a warehouse the con's had used as a base. He was locked in a room. They'd had to sedate him to get him out. He hadn't been happy to see them and from the energon dried on his thighs, they knew why. He'd been calmer once he woke up. Provided you didn't try to touch him or get too close. It had been months before he'd even told them his name and now he wouldn't shut up. Ever.

So, Jazz wondered about Blurr. The non-stop talking and the constant fidgeting, a personality quirk or a sign of something more serious? Something that touched them all. Some lightly, some deeply. Jazz knew somewhere deep inside him, war had left a mark on him too. It just worried him. Why couldn't he see it?


	13. Blurr: Guard Duty: Contest fic

**Disclaimer: **Not mine.

**Author's Note: **Written for Trailsmaagirl's contest on deviantart. Had to have guard duty, one of four pairings and a kiss.

--

Blurr couldn't decide which emotion to settle on, bored or annoyed. Of all the things he could be doing escorting the human liaison was not on his list of top ten. Except of course he wasn't escorting, he was guarding. There had been a lot of decepticon activity lately so Prowl had decided the liaison needed a guard. That didn't really explain to Blurr why he was there. Bluestreak he could understand, but him. Surely there was someone more suited than him.

The liaison was travelling in Bluestreak, who had immediately struck up a conversation which left Blurr with nothing to do. He couldn't go at anywhere near his top speed. He couldn't even go at the speed limit. The rain was too heavy for that and when they got closer to the Ark there would be the mud. Wouldn't that be fun.

He turned his thoughts to Prowl, this was Prowl's fault. Blurr knew why he'd been picked. This was because of the tar. But that hadn't been Blurr's fault. He'd warned Prowl they were resurfacing the road, but Prowl hadn't listened or maybe he'd just forgotten. Anyway when he was chasing down the decepticon he drove straight through the line of traffic cones and got stuck in the wet tar. It had taken Ratchet all day to get the gunk out of his systems and Blurr knew that Prowl blamed him. So he'd sent Blurr out in the rain and the mud on a boring mission to collect and guard a human liaison. Blurr needed to pay him back. But he was chief of security, he couldn't just prank him. As a particularly large puddle sprayed over his windshield, Blurr came up with an evil plan.

They drove up to the Ark. Optimus and Prowl were standing just inside waiting to greet the liaison. Blurr pulled up and transformed. Bluestreak took a little longer, he had to wait for the liaison to get out and clear. Blurr watched as the liaison walked towards Optimus and Prowl. As soon as he judged the human was a safe distance away he grabbed Bluestreak, spun him round and thoroughly kissed him. Optimus, Prowl and the human stared in utter shock, watching Blurr slide his tongue past Bluestreak's lips.

Blurr abruptly broke away and swanned off into the base, leaving behind two stunned autobots, one stunned human and one melting logic chip Prowl.


	14. Happy Blurr

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Transformers. Lalala

**Author's Note:** Blurr's happy. I'm screaming bloody furious. This is assuming Blurr was built for the war. Not particularly keen on the ending. Thanks for the lovely reviews. Enjoy.

--

Blurr followed after Oilchange trying and failing to keep the grin off his face. At least he'd managed to restrain himself enough not to skip. He'd been online for a week now and Oilchange had told him that this would be the last test. After he'd passed he'd be a fully functioning mech, finally able to fulfil his purpose. He'd been looking forward to this since he'd onlined.

They reached the test track and Oilchange told him to go for it. Blurr transformed and remembering what he'd been told, built up speed gradually. As his speed rose, his spark thrummed louder and louder. This was what he'd been made for. He came up on two wheels as he turned a corner and let out a yelp of pure delight. This was the best feeling in the world. The wind caressing his chassis, his wheels barely touching the ground, the roar of air in his audios and his spark purring in his chest. He saw Oilchange waiting at the end of the track, transformed and skidded to a halt.

"SoIpassedyeah?Ipassed?Ipassed?Ipassedright?CanIgoroundagainplease?Icangoagainyeah."

Oilchange shook his head at Blurr's enthusiasm and checked the readouts from the scanner fastened on Blurr's arm. Then he gave him a quick scan over himself and smiled.

"You passed fine. I'll mark you down as functional and you'll be assigned a unit tomorrow. If you want to stay here in the meantime that's up to you."

Blurr watched Oilchange head back to the base before zooming off round the track again.


	15. Angry Blurr

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Transformers.

**Author's Note: **Back to angst. I had big plans for this one but I've forgotten them. Maybe I'll remember. I went to bed at 5 this morning and was woken up at 9. The people upstairs have the builders in. I dunno what they're doing but it seems to involve hitting the metal stairs repeatedly with a hammer. **DOI-OING! **I've been imagining Grimlock using it for origami. Thank you lovely reviewers and readers you are also lovely. Thankies

--

Fire. He watched it burn. Everything came to this. Smoke and ashes, screams and pain. The embers were clogging his vents but he didn't move. Always moving but now he was still. What had they done? This was what their world had become. He had never seen a cityscape as it was meant to be, only rubble and ruins. He wondered if he asked those who were old enough to remember, if they still would. Spires reaching for the sky. He couldn't even imagine it. This base had been home and what was it now. The outer wall was melting, glowing red. This war was never going to end. If someone had asked him, he couldn't have told them how it had even started. Someone must have told him once but he had forgotten. He hadn't asked for this. 

The explosion caused by flames hitting the energon stores was quite impressive. Blurr gave it a seven. This wasn't the first base he'd watched burn and it wouldn't be the last, he knew that for a fact. Optimus was giving a rousing speech about how tomorrow they would destroy the con's base but Blurr wasn't listening. Sure maybe tomorrow they would destroy the con's base, drink and dance in the light from the flames. He'd done that before. The con's were still there. The autobot's were still there. They killed the con's and were happy. The con's killed them and they were sad. Happy, sad, happy, sad.

He had vague memories of other emotions but they weren't there anymore. Just the rage with a tinge of happiness or sadness painted over the top. The anger was always there. Smiling, laughing, crying, overloading always the fury was there. He didn't know when it had happened. When it had appeared. Maybe he'd woken up one morning to find it there. He didn't know or even really care. It had been vague at first. Hovering on the edge of consciousness until one day it was all he knew. Maybe the others felt it too. He looked towards Optimus as he finished his speech and wondered if underneath his quiet, confident exterior. Did the fire burn?


	16. Stuck Blurr

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Transformers

**Author's Note: **I'm back in crack! (Sorry.) My laptop made me do it. It's a bad Apple. (I'm really sorry.) Read the fic. That's better :-)

--

"Slag it all."

"What!No!Noslagitall!Slagitallbad!Getup!"

We're stuck."

"No!Wecan'tbestuckIdon'twannabestuck.GetupgetoffIdon'twannabestuck."

"I agree. We can't be stuck. The decepticons are attacking. The base is totally exposed. There must be a way. Try harder."

"You try harder. This is all your fault. The decepticons aren't attacking here. They're miles away. Along with all the other autobots. So now we're stuck and it's your fault."

"Idon'twannabestuckIdon't..."

"This is not my fault."

Yes it is."

"No. It isn't."

"Idon'twannabestuck."

"It is."

"It is not."

"Idon'twannabestuckI..."

"Is."

"Is not."

"Idon'twannabestuckIdon'twanna..."

"Is too."

"Is not. Blurr will you shut up!"

"No.Idon'twannabestuck.ItisyourfaultandifyoucanbeannoyingIcantoo,soitisyourfaultandIdon'twannabestuck."

"It is not my fault."

"Yesitis." "Yes it is." Arcee drove her elbow back. Hard.

"Ow!That'sme!Don'thitme!" Blurr kicked but couldn't hit anything.

"Sorry Blurr."

"Arcee did you just try to hit me?"

"Yes."

_A joor later..._

Prowl was anxious. "Sir. I don't like this. Red Alert should have asked us to identify ourselves. Where are Arcee and Blurr?"

"I agree." replied Optimus "Autobots. Proceed with caution."

Nervously they entered the base.

It was Prowl who voiced the obvious. "No one's here. This is very strange."

Jazz found them. He didn't say anything. He didn't have to. The others heard the crash, followed by hysterical laughter.

"Help us!"

"Help me!"

"Helphelpgetusoutgetmeouthelp!"

The autobots (those of them near the front anyway) stared. Red Alert, Blurr and Arcee were stuck at the foot of the stairs, jammed in between the walls. Red Alert and Arcee were a confused tangle of limbs, while Blurr was pressed face against the wall with his legs dangling over them.

Optimus was not leader of the autobots for nothing. He yelled over the laughter "What happened?"

"Red Alert!" "RedAlert!"

"For the last time it's not my fragging fault!"

"Yesitis!"

"He was running around fritzing as usual. Blurr and I came upstairs to try and calm him down. The idiot ran into us. It is his fault."

"I resent that remark. It was an accident!"

"OK, OK." Optimus turned to the only non hysterical autobot. "Prowl. Help me."

Red Alert came out first. Arcee came out growling. "You've got ten seconds."

"Wasteoftime." Blurr flipped himself over.

Optics wide, Red Alert hopped through the giggling autobots and ran. He gained the corner before Blurr disentangled himself from Arcee and went after him.

"Ahhh!"

"Blurr! Wait!" Arcee sounded close to hysterics herself. "Save some for me!"

"Ahhh!" Clank, crash, bang.

Prowl turned to Optimus. "Shouldn't we do something?"

"Yes." said the fearless leader.

"I notice you're not moving."

"Ahhhh!

"Neither are you."

"Ahh!"

"Leaders first. Anyway Jazz won't let go."

Optimus looked down and further down. Jazz was clinging to Prowl's leg, hiccupping into his ankle.

"I think they deserve some revenge."

"OW! AHH!"

They winced.

"OK, that's enough." Optimus hoisted Prowl up by the arm, shaking Jazz off in the process. "But we'll walk slowly."

"Ahh!"


	17. Desiring Blurr

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Transformers. I grow weary of typing this.

**Author's Note:** Short. Sorry. First person for a change. Blurr has a stalker.

--

I didn't even notice you when first we met. Well, that's not strictly true, of course I noticed you. You came round the corner at a speed I'm sure is illegal and knocked me flying. I wasn't amused. But you apologised and I don't hold grudges so I let it go. Still I didn't pay much attention to you. 

One day I overheard you talking. You never talk to me. I heard your voice, so fast yet I understood every word. I loved the way it rose and fell almost like music to me. The expressions that you used. I loved those too. I started watching you then. Soon I loved the way you move. So fast even when you're slow. The after images you leave behind like stillness in motion. Now I love everything. The colour of your armour. Every curve and plane. Everything. 

I'm certain you don't know. I think you would have said something. Especially after the cliff incident. But maybe you don't know about that. I knew you were in medbay so I 'accidentally' drove over the edge. Probably should have checked you were online first. Everyone teased me for weeks. How could I have failed to stop in time? I'm sure if you knew or suspected, you'd have said something then. 

I wait in the washracks when you come back filthy. I drink my energon slow in case you come in. I watch you. But you don't see me. I don't think you ever will. I should tell you really. But I'm scared. What if you say no or worse you know and are fed up with my stalking. I'd have to stop. I can't do that. I watch you, follow you, wait for you, dream about you. My life revolves around you and you don't even know it.


	18. Bolting Blurr

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Transformers.

**Author's Note: **It's bloody hard coming up with titles for these but I want them for my own purposes, so please excuse their irrelevance. This turned out OK. I had a different ending originally but I had to go rescue my cat from a dog and I forgot it. Thankies for the reviews, favs and alerts. Enjoy.

--

Jazz had overslept. It didn't really matter though as he wasn't on duty, but there was a message from Optimus to meet him outside to discuss security measures for the new base. Jazz quite liked the new base, they were miles from the humans so he could stand around stretching and yawning as he waited for Optimus to arrive. Then something caught his eye, he smirked evilly as he sneaked closer.

Optimus, Ironhide and Prowl came out, looking for Jazz. Optimus saw him first. For once his poise failed him. All he could do was watch in horror. Ironhide and Prowl saw him freeze and turned to look. Ironhide made a meeping sound and stepped forward, flailing madly. Prowl simply winced.

Blurr and Bumblebee had been working hard all night. Both were concentrating fully on their task, eager to finish so they could get off their aching knees. Blurr smoothed the earth back down, thoughts of energon and recharge floating peacefully through his mind. Suddenly a hand clamped onto the back of his neck. His spark expanded in shock then contracted painfully.

"AHHHH!" "Yiiiiii!"

Bumblebee had suffered the same fate. He tried to run but he couldn't break free. Blurr had better luck. He struggled, failed and threw his speed into it. The hand let go and Blurr bolted.

Jazz fought to keep hold and was pulled over, flattening Bumblebee underneath him. This turned out to be fortunate. Explosions started in the direction Blurr had fled. All Jazz could do was curl himself around Bumblebee and pray they were far enough away.

Bumblebee simply prayed. He had no idea what was going on. Whoever had grabbed him was on top of him and while he wanted to throw them off the explosions were too close for that.

Blurr just carried on running. Having started it was far too late to stop. He could hear the blasts behind him and feel hot air on his back. So he ran.

Optimus pulled down Ironhide and Prowl, he had the sinking feeling that Ratchet would blame him for this. It wasn't his fault but he would get the blame. As the last explosion calmed down and Blurr disappeared over the horizon, he picked himself up and ran to check on Jazz and Bumblebee.

They were also picking themselves up. Bumblebee blinked stupidly at Jazz, then turned his dazed gaze to the arm waving, frantic looking Optimus. Behind Optimus, Prowl was blinking stupidly back at him while Ironhide rolled around screaming or laughing. His audios had been offlined by the blasts and Bumblebee couldn't tell which. Behind them was the entire base with expressions ranging from amused to bemused. Ratchet stood in front of them all. He was definitely not amused. Bumblebee wondered what exactly had just happened.

That was also Jazz's only thought. His audios were also offline so he could only watch as Optimus skidded to a halt. In Jazz's opinion he'd never looked more like Ratchet. He was hopping from foot to foot, waving his arms over his head and making frantic gestures which Jazz didn't feel up to interpreting. Optimus froze. Jazz watched his optics narrow and realised he'd said the Ratchet comment out loud. He cringed. Optimus stooped, grabbed a rock and flung it at Jazz's head.

Meanwhile Blurr was also wondering what had happened. He'd finally come to a halt twenty miles from the base when he realised no one was following him. He dithered for a while thinking back over events and trying to decide what to do. He'd been working with Bumblebee, someone had grabbed him, he'd run, there had been explosions. The decepticons were attacking! Quickly but cautiously he headed back to base.

He arrived, guns blazing, to a scene of utter chaos. Almost everyone was sitting around laughing. Prowl was helping Bumblebee back inside while Optimus and Ratchet were taking turns hitting Jazz upside the head. Blurr briefly wondered if he should run back into the desert when he was spotted.

"Blurr!"

Blurr jumped. He hadn't noticed Ironhide there. "Blurr! You're back. That." Ironhide grabbed hold of his arm and pulled himself up. "That was hysterical. You're alright, aren't you? Good." He pointed dramatically. "To the medbay!" Not knowing what else to do Blurr followed him.

Ratchet and Optimus finally stopped beating on Jazz and dragged him to the medbay. There they found Prowl, Bumblebee, Ironhide and Blurr, who all stared at them as they came in. Blurr glaring evilly at Jazz. Ratchet set Jazz on a table and quickly repaired his and Bumblebee's audios. Once they were functioning, Optimus wasted no more time.

"What in the name of Vector Sigma were you thinking?" Obviously he had yet to see the funny side, unlike Ironhide who was still occasionally giggling.

Jazz shrugged. "I saw them afts in the air and I couldn't resist."

"You didn't think that bots planting mines should perhaps not be startled?"

"I didn't know they were planting mines. Honestly, how would I know that?"

"An announcement was made this morning." Prowl sounded rather strange.

"I was in recharge."

"Another was made in the afternoon." It was almost like he was being strangled.

"I was still in recharge."

Optimus rubbed his optics. "Why did you think we were meeting outside?"

"It's a nice day."

Ironhide snorted, Optimus despaired. He pointed a shaking finger. "You will replant them. Alone." Jazz opened his mouth. "Now."

"But.."

**_"Now, soldier."_**

Jazz did as he was told.

"Ironhide, shut up. Prowl, make sure everyone knows. Tell them all individually if you have to. Bumblebee, go to bed. Blurr, _think _before you panic please. I need a drink." He left.

--

**FYI: **I realised in a moment of heart stopping dread that I'm flying to Germany next Wednesday, so I'm sorry but this is going on hold for a couple of weeks. I've got stuff I've got to do before I go and I know me very well. It won't get done if I'm writing stories. Apologies.


	19. Shiny Blurr

**Disclaimer: **Recognisable characters not mine.

**Author's Note: **Inspired by SilverPhantom's Crossed Wires chapter 10 which I reccomend you read because it is excellent and not cracky. In it Blurr and Wheeljack are recently bonded and that's pretty much all you need to know. First sentence and a half are direct quotes. Enjoy.

--

"...fragging glitch Blurr do_ not_.."

Wheeljack was cut off when a rather loud explosion echoed across the battlefield knocking everyone flat on their backs. He sat up rubbing his helm and instantly realised they had a problem.

"AHHHH!"

The light. He was blinded by the light. The comm was immediately filled with traffic. "What happened?" "What is it?" "The decpticons have a new weapon!" "I can't see!"

Wheeljack cut across them all. "Blurr, what did you do?"

"Itwasinyourlab.Ididn'tknow.Icouldn'tknow.Ithoughtitwasabomb.HowwouldIknow?"

Wheeljack ignored Prowl's interrogation of Blurr and squinted at the incredibly shiny decpticons staggering around in confusion. He squinted at the autobots. They were shiny too.

Slowly, dangerously, he spoke. "You took the new wax dispenser from my lab."

"Ithoughtitwasabomb." Blurr sounded rather squeaky. He could feel Wheeljack's anger through the bond. It wasn't a pleasant sensation. There was his worry and underneath sliding insidiously along his emotions was Wheeljack's rage, seeping through his spark, filling him up. It really was awful.

"You thought it was a bomb." Wheeljack couldn't feel Blurr's nerves or the guilt that was rapidly replacing them. The battle was forgotten, there was just this slow, creeping fury. "You thought it was a bomb. It was in my lab so you thought it was a bomb. You thought it was a bomb and took it even though it might not have worked to use on the decpticons. You thought it was a bomb. **NOT EVERYTHING I MAKE EXPLODES!** Why does everyone think everything I make explodes?"

"But,itdidexplode." Wheeljack wasn't listening.

"I make lots of perfectly pleasant harmless inventions. But, no. Wheeljack, what does it do? How many decpticons will it kill, maim, injure, Wheeljack? You tried to blow up the decpticons with my newly improved wax dispenser!"

"Newly improved." Prowl muttered darkly. Unnoticed by Wheeljack the battle was over. The decpticons unable to see their opponents had retreated. The incredibly shiny autobots were watching Wheeljack's rant with glee albeit through scrunched up optics.

"You, you have just given the decpticons the best wax job of their creation! What made you think it would explode?"

"It is a spectacular wax job, is it not?" Tracks was trying to admire himself in Sunstreaker's armour.

"Itdidexplode."

"It did explode! It did explode! That makes it alright then does it? Hmmm?"

"Er..." Blurr was for once at a loss for words. How had this happened? Take bomb from Wheeljack's lab, use on decpticons. Simple plan and it had worked. Sort of. Why was Wheeljack so angry?

"How could you mistake a perfectly harmless invention for a bomb? What is wrong with you?"

That hurt. That really hurt. He'd only been trying to help. Nothing horrendous had happened. He opened his mouth to apologise or defend himself or something when Prowl decided enough was enough and stepped in.

"Wheeljack it did explode. The decpticons are gone and really I'm rather glad your wax dispenser was tested on them. Out here. Not in the washracks. On us." Prowl's rather pointed tone finally got through Wheeljack's self righteous indignation.

"It...it exploded? My wax dispenser exploded? **WHY DOES EVERYTHING I MAKE** **EXPLODE?**"

Everybody watched the ranting, arm waving Wheeljack for a moment before deciding to give their aching optics a rest and headed inside. Blurr hesitated for a while longer then realised he was only going to get asked the impossible and also headed inside.

That night...

Prime returned from his diplomatic mission. He looked forward to his energon and bed. He was so preoccupied with these pleasant thoughts that he nearly walked right past Bluestreak without acknowledging him. He stopped abruptly, nodded politely, continued on his way and stopped abruptly. He looked back. He wasn't imagining it. Bluestreak was incredibly shiny. He crept back, bent nearly double and peered closer.

Bluestreak was focused on his duty. All sensors stretched outwards into the night when he felt a strange sensation. Like he was being watched. He shifted uncomfortably, looked round and nearly jumped out of his armour. Prime jumped too said "Goodnight Bluestreak." and walked quickly away without looking back. Bluestreak tried to settle back into his guard duty but it was hard. Every few minutes he would look around swiftly like he was trying to catch someone out. He was still trying to convince himself that Prime hadn't been staring at his aft from an inch away when his shift ended four hours later.


	20. Evil Blurr

**Disclaimer: I** do not own Transformers.

**Warning: **Humans die non-graphically. Graphic OOCness.

**Author's note: **I like the end. The best endings just come to me and this just came. Enjoy.

--

Blurr was on his first ever mission on this planet. He hadn't seen much of it so far and was looking forward to exploring. He'd landed nearly a week ago and had spent the intervening time hanging around the base, settling in and getting to know Sam and Mikaela the resident humans. He thought the autobots had landed on their feet here. A nice planet with nice natives. It seemed too good to be true.

He turned onto his exit. He had to deliver this device Wheeljack had made to some laboratory in this city. Wheeljack had told him all about this device but Blurr hadn't been listening. He'd heard the important bits. It wasn't dangerous, the humans were expecting it and they knew how to use it. Blurr considered that to be all he needed to know.

He drove through the city, it was a nice day. The sun was shining and it had been a quick and easy drive. He didn't like the speed limits here. Not even a hundred miles an hour! But he supposed he could live with it. There were the traffic lights as well. They were annoying. Stop. Start. Stop. Start. He wondered if Optimus could broker some sort of deal where these things wouldn't affect autobots. He understood why the humans needed them. They could crash. But the autobots wouldn't do that. They had sensors that told them where every other car was at every moment. Their brakes were second to none. There was no real reason why they should be constrained by human limitations. Blurr made a mental note to talk to Optimus about it when he returned from this mission.

He sighed as the cars in front of him slowed down. More lights! He planned out how to present his idea to Optimus. Maybe he could sound out some of the others first. See if he could get them on side. He came out of his daydream and realised they were still stationary. It had been nearly ten minutes. Why weren't they moving?

Twenty minutes! This was seriously irritating. He flicked through radio stations and police reports. There had been an accident up ahead. Expect major delays. Major delays! Frag that! He went to reverse. He was boxed in. While he'd been thinking and waiting more cars had come up behind and now there was no escape. He growled to himself and settled in for a long wait.

Blurr wasn't really designed for waiting. Seconds to him were minutes. Minutes an eternity. Hours didn't bear contemplating. But stuck for hours he was. He had been in the jam for a mere thirty minutes when Prowl had commed to find out what was keeping him. He had logged off hurriedly when Blurr had snarled and with an amazing vocabulary filled Prowl in on exactly what had happened and his thoughts on the entire situation. Nobody disturbed him again. 

This was probably a mistake on their part. After three hours something deep inside Blurr snapped. He snarled, rammed the car in front of him and transformed. Humans screamed, abandoned their cars and ran for it. They didn't get far. Blurr powered up his weapon and fired. Cars flew, humans were incinerated. Blurr giggled.

"How'sthatthen?Imprisonme,willyou?Trafficjams!" Blast. "Speedlimits!" Boom. "Trafficlights!" Bang. "Trafficlaws!" Pow. "WhatinthenameofVectorSigmaiswrongwithyourspecies?" Zap.

Blurr continued on his one bot rampage. What he didn't shoot, he crushed, squashed or demolished.

The army attempted to intervene but they stood no chance. As soon as they targeted him, he was somewhere else. The autobots were informed and came racing (breaking the speed limits) to try and contain the situation.

"Blurr! What are you doing?" Prime tried reason.

"ThisplanetisthePit!Theymademedriveslow!Theymademestopatlights!Therewasatrafficjam!Theyareevilandhavetodie!" He started shooting again.

"Autobots. Stop him."

After a few false starts, they decided the easiest thing to do would be to surround him and jump him. This was relatively simple. Blurr didn't care about the autobots. He just wanted the humans dead.

While the sedated Blurr was dragged back to base, Prime stayed behind to apologise, grovel and basically suck up. He assured the authorities Blurr would be punished and one way or another the problem solved.

Blurr paced the brig. He didn't know why the others couldn't see. The humans were evil. They were a decepticon trick. They had tried to trap him. Something had to be done.

The doors hissed open. Blurr watched warily as Prime, Prowl and Ratchet walked in. They talked at him. He didn't bother to listen. They weren't on his side. He heard something about punishment and reprogramming and all he could think was one day they would see. The humans would turn on them and he would be proved right.

Ratchet watched as Blurr drifted into recharge. His howl of "ONNNNEDAAAAAAY" dying off. He wondered how his programming had become so corrupted without any of them noticing. He hated having to reprogram mechs. Even before the war when his patients had been strangers, he had hated it. It was ten times worse now.

Two weeks later..

Blurr onlined slowly.

"Yes, I'm positive. All corrupt programs have been wiped. He's a clean slate. He won't remember anything."

"Side affects?"

"Unknown. You never know how a reprogramming will work till you bring them online."

"So, he could be dangerous?"

"Hence the restraints."

"Very well. Blurr can you hear me?"

Optimus and Ratchet looked expectantly at Blurr. He stared back at them passively. 

"Blurr." Optimus tried again.

"Strange. All readouts say he's fully functional."

They stared at the unmoving Blurr.

"Maybe it's taking a while for his processor to get up to speed. Leave him alone for a while. I'm staying here anyway."

"Yes..."

Wheeljack leapt about three feet in the air. Blurr who had stood silent and unmoving for three days had finally spoken. Ratchet had spoken to Wheeljack and he knew just what to do.

"RAAAAAAATCHET!" he commed.

"I...

can..."

Ratchet ran into the medbay so fast he nearly fell over. "What? What is it?"

Wheeljack pointed. "He spoke."

"What did he say?"

"Er..."

"hear...

you."

They stared in horror. There was a five minute pause between each word. Ratchet ran some scans.

"Primus, I've created a monster."

"What do you mean?"

"I reversed him! He's the slowest mech ever!"

--

**Author's note: **Duh duh dun. drmario1992 and I were having a strange conversation on deviantart. It was long and convoluted and boiled down to..  Blurr can never come to earth because if he did he'd get stuck in a traffic jam, go insane and join the decepticons. Well he doesn't join the decepticons 'cos that would require me to have some idea of the difference between the two factions besides autobots good, decepticons bad. If I ever feel myself capable I might attempt a serious version of evil Blurr.


	21. Unappreciated Blurr

**Disclaimer: **Transformers not mine.

**Author's Note: **I've been stuck on this for two weeks averaging a sentence a day. I don't consider this finished but I can't do any more now so enjoy it.

--

Blurr wasn't sure what to do. He'd done it again. He wasn't exactly sure what he'd done but they didn't like him doing it. It was always the same. He was talking too fast, moving too fast, doing things too fast. He wasn't sure what they wanted him to do. They had built him to be fast. They'd wanted a fast messenger so they'd built him and now that he was here all he could do was wrong. Why build him to be fast and tell him to go slow? He knew he hadn't been online long but he didn't think it would make any more sense in ten vorns. He was what they had built him to be. Why did they want him to change?

He'd tried going slowly, really he had. He couldn't do it. Not for long anyway. Someone would tell him to slow down so he would. For a while. He'd never lasted more than a joor. It went against what he was. To walk rather than run, to talk slowly and controlled. He had to concentrate so hard just to keep the rhythm right. Why couldn't they understand?

The real problem was there was nowhere else for him to go. Every time he met someone new it was the same. "Slow down. Why d'you talk so fast? Is there something wrong with his timing program?" So he was stuck with people who didn't appreciate him, who probably wouldn't care all that much if he didn't make it out of the next battle.


	22. Annoying Blurr

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Transformers.

**Author's Note:** I haven't said it before so I'm saying it now. I was inspired to write this whole thing by the various character meme's running around mainly the 28 one. Any prompts you recognise most likely came from wherever you recognise it from. I get my ideas any way I can. This particular one came from drmario1992 on deviantart who said something to the effect of Blurr deliberately talking fast to annoy people. Anyways enjoy the comedy 'cos tomorrow is dark. My insomnia is back and swift on its heels came my muse.

--

"Blurr, would you shut up! Always yammering on. We don't want to hear every little detail."

Blurr narrowed his optics. He hadn't been yammering on. It was important. But if HotRod didn't want to hear it he didn't have to. Blurr smirked to himself. There were plenty of other things he could tell HotRod. Plenty.

"SoSideswipetoldBumblebeewhotoldBluestreakwhotoldWheeljackwhotoldRatchetwhotoldJazzwhotoldSpringerwhotoldme..."

Windcharger watched with interest as HotRod walked stiffly into the room with Blurr by his side. Steeljaw had told him about this earlier but he hadn't believed him. He'd assumed it had been a one off but here they were again and HotRod did look annoyed. Furious actually. 

As Windcharger watched he rounded on Blurr. "Shutup. Shutup. SHUTUP!" 

It started as a low hiss and steadily rose to a roar. Blurr didn't seem perturbed he simply matched volume.

"sotheywentbacktolookagain'cosonelookisneverenough,youknowwhatImeanIT'SBESTTOHAVETWOORTHREETOBEABSOLUTELYpositivelydefinitelysure."

Windcharger grinned. This promised entertainment. He was disappointed. HotRod simply deflated, shoulders down, head drooped and stomped over to the energon dispensers with his talking shadow. Having collected his energon he walked out, Blurr by his side.

The next evening found Windcharger back in the rec. room waiting. All day he'd heard about the continuing Blurr/HotRod saga and he was eager to view it for himself. He'd been waiting for about half an hour when he heard it.

"Areyougonnabethere?I'mgonnabethere,areyougonnabethere,huh?Wheeljack'sexperimentsarealwaysgood.I'mdefinitelygonnabethere.Whataboutyou?"

They appeared side by side. Blurr talking animatedly, hands waving, big grin. HotRod head down, shoulders square, optics glaring balefully. All conversation ceased. Blurr seemed completely oblivious to the attention, continuing his monologue in a horrendously cheerful tone. It was impossible to tell if HotRod had noticed the silence, he kept his gaze fixed on the energon dispensers like a drowning man fixed on the shore.

He collected his energon and drank it in a preoccupied manner then calmly put down the cube and aimed a punch kick combo at Blurr's head. He missed completely. Blurr simply side-stepped talking non-stop the whole time. HotRod stood, fists clenching and unclenching, steam hissing from his vents.

Windcharger leaned forward. If it wasn't for Blurr you could of heard a pin drop. Just as the tension became unbearable HotRod spun on his heel and without saying a word stomped out with Blurr happily trotting after.

The next day to Windcharger's unending delight he was posted to the communications room. It was also the day that HotRod cracked. Blaster hooked up to the security cameras and they watched with glee as HotRod ran down the halls in a doomed attempt to get away from Blurr who was easily loping alongside.

He'd pulled out all the stops. Instead of talking he was singing "Iknowasongthat'llgetonyournerves,getonyournerves,getonyournerves.Iknowasongthat'llgetonyournerves,getgetgetonyournerves."

Windcharger hit the floor in hysterics. Blaster was made of sterner stuff he remained glued to the screen.

"Oh Primus no!"

"What, what?"

Windcharger leapt to his feet, staring anxiously at the screen.

"They're headed straight for Optimus."

They watched horror-struck convinced Optimus would put an end to their fun. Nothing happened. HotRod ran past Optimus, determination etched on his faceplate. Blurr simply grinned and waved. Optimus stopped, waited, blinked and continued on his way. Windcharger and Blaster looked at each other, shrugged and zoomed back in on HotRod.

That night Windcharger's good fortune remained with him. He was on guard duty with Blurr.

"Blurr, can I ask you something?"

"Goahead."

"What's going on with you and HotRod?"

Blurr grinned and looked at him sidelong.

"Hetoldmetoshutup."

He told you to shut up?"

"Twodaysago.He'salwaysdoingit.It'sreallyannoying.SoI'mteachinghimalessonhewon'tforget."

Windcharger giggled

"You're gonna get in trouble for this, you know that right?"

"It'llbeworthit.I'mgonnastoptomorrowanyway.IfigureHotRod'llcrawlintoProwl'sofficerightafterIcatchupwithhimafterpatrol." He shrugged. "Thenit'llbegameover.ButRoddywon'tforgetandIdon'treckonhe'lltellmetoshutupforatleastamonth."


	23. On His Knees Blurr

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Transformers or Megadeth

**Warning: **Torture (not particularly graphic)

**Author's Note:  **AU on Cybertron. Lovely and dark. This one was inspired by a Megadeth song. Die Dead Enough. 

--

He hadn't been fast enough. He'd like to think there had been another reason but there wasn't. It had come down to speed and he had lost. He might as well admit it, no point in lying now. He'd fought in this war as long as he could remember. He'd faced death many times but this was the first time he'd prayed for it

He heard the whine of a plasma cannon charging and turned his face towards it. He recognised the seeker, Starscream, Wing Commander. He'd heard things about him. Nothing good. Still maybe that would work in his favour, maybe he would simply shoot him. That last shot had taken out his knee joint, there would be no more running for him. He didn't even know where his gun had ended up. Not close enough. So he offlined his optics and hoped for a quick death. 

They grabbed him, two of them and left the ground behind. He'd never flown like this before and under other circumstances might have enjoyed it but all he felt was fear. They were taking him to be tortured he knew. He would eventually tell them everything, he knew that too and that was terrifying because he knew everything. Everything.

It had been a gamble. Optimus Prime's gamble not his but that didn't make it any better. They'd been cut off from Ultra Magnus' troops for years now unable to communicate because the con's were listening in but Optimus had a plan to rejoin with Ultra Magnus and regain the city. It was a good plan and it probably would have worked but he'd had to carry it off and he had failed.

Prowl had said they should have used more messengers but Optimus was adament. Blurr could do it he said then all the plan would be there, no chance of a crucial bit being mislaid. They'd put their faith in his speed and lost. Both sides would be moving into position now. After reporting to Ultra Magnus he had been supposed to join Optimus at designated coordinates to make sure Magnus' side of things was going smoothly. They wouldn't worry if Blurr didn't show up for a few days. More than enough time for the con's to get the information out of him. He'd seen mechs after the con's were done with them. He'd always hoped it would never be him. 

The seekers banked ready to land. They were here. They dragged him through the corridors and dumped him on the floor, they didn't bother to chain him. That couldn't be good. The first kick came almost immediately. He curled in on himself and tried to think of something else. Just stay quiet as long as possible that's all he had to do. Maybe if he was quiet for long enough Optimus would make his move. He'd still be dead but the autobots would win that was good enough. The kicking had stopped. When had the kicking stopped? Before he could risk a look hands reached into his knee joint and pulled. Blurr screamed. Before he'd finished he was kicked onto his back, a foot holding him down.

"You're a messenger. What was your message?" He didn't answer. "What were you doing in that sector?" The con bent lower, red optics staring into his. "You will tell us. We will rip you apart piece by piece and somewhere along the way you will tell us what we want to know. Then we will kill you." 

Blurr believed him. As hands reached into his circuits he cast around desperately for some sort of distraction.

He lay where he was left. They were leaving him alone for now. He didn't know why and didn't really care. Maybe they were eating sparklings for breakfast. His thoughts were getting very strange. That was probably very bad. He couldn't care about that either. That was bad, the little sense he had left told him that.

They'd stopping ripping circuits out. There were only so many of them after all. They hooked him up to something. He didn't know what it was. It hurt. That was all he needed to know. He wondered how long he'd been here. Had it been long enough. Could he tell them what they wanted to know yet. Maybe he should ask how long he'd been here. They might tell him. Then if it was long enough he could tell them whatever it was he was supposed to tell them.

He started to panic then. He'd forgotten what he had to tell them. If he couldn't tell them what they wanted to hear they wouldn't kill him.

They had to kill him. They had to. He couldn't live like this. He had to remember. He couldn't remember. Alone in his cell Blurr started to wail.

--

_I can't punch hard enough_

_I can't kick high enough_

_I can't shoot straight enough_

_I can't hold on enough_

_I can't stay down enough_

_I can't take pain enough_

_I can't bleed fast enough_

_I can't die dead enough _       **-Die Dead Enough, Megadeth**


	24. Turned On Blurr

**Disclaimer:** Alas, Hasbro has not given me Transformers overnight. I still don't own a damn thing.

**Warning: **Slash between alien robots

**Author's Note:** I could lie and tell you I wrote this for all you slash fans out there but the truth is I was looking through the prompts and the only one that didn't make my brain go "error, error, system error, redo from start" was Turned On so after the longest sentence ever here you go. Enjoy

--

He arched into the touch, engine purring loudly. Hands drifted down his chassis exploring every gap in his armour, stroking circuits and tweaking wires. He ran his hands through the seam of his lover's wings searching for that sensitive spot. There. He grinned as his lover arched, hands gripping his hips, his body seeming to vibrate, gasping out his name.

Blurr watched from behind his boulder as Skywarp collapsed groaning. "I'll get you back for that. In a minute."

He'd been heading back to base when he picked up the seekers signals. They were in front of him coming up fast so rather than try to outrun them like he normally would, he'd dampened his signal and hidden among these boulders. It was probably the best idea he'd had all year. The seekers had landed in this nice, secluded spot and proceeded to give him a free show. They'd been at it for a couple of hours now and if Skywarp's comment was anything to go by they weren't done yet. The only problem Blurr could see was that he was stuck until they left, but he was back early as usual and no one would notice if he didn't turn up for a while.

The seekers were starting up again, deft fingers moving slowly, slight moans escaping their lips. Blurr directed his attention back towards them and settled in to watch.

Starscream whined as Skywarp stopped nibbling on his neck only to gasp as he came up to bite at his lip. He opened his mouth to grant him access only to jerk in surprise at a metallic crash to his left.

Blurr lifted his face out of the dirt and met the staring optics of his sworn enemies. He considered his position, jumped up, mind racing, opened his mouth and said. "Uh...Hi...Ididn'tIdidn'tseeyouthere.Haveyouseenadatapad?IthinkIdroppeditearlier.No?Oh,Ok.Uh.Bye."

The stunned decepticons could only watch as he transformed and sped off. After a minute Starscream shook himself and said. "What are you waiting for? After him."

Blurr made the base in record time, shot past the guards who were well used to such behaviour from him and raced to Prowl's office. It took him five tries to speak slowly enough for Prowl to understand as he gave his report, then he shot back out again leaving a slightly stupefied Prowl in his wake. He gained the rec. room and glanced around. Only Sunstreaker was present. Good, he thought, at least he wouldn't have to be subtle.

"Doyouwantafrag?"

Startled, Sunstreaker looked up then his expression turned thoughtful.

"Yesorno?TrustmeI'mnotgonnagetanyhornierbymakingmewait.Sodoyouwantafragordon'tyou?"

Sunstreaker scowled. "Fine, but we're using your room."

--

So thankies for reviews and to my anonymous reviewer (who is possibly called RWG I 'm not too sure about that.) Special thanks for trying to help me improve even though I'm ignoring what you said. I know a lot of people don't like Blurr's words running together but I do (I'm actually disappointed when people don't do it. I'm that weird.) If I ever have him do some long winded speech which really is headache making I'll put in gaps I swear it. Thankies again.


	25. Falling Blurr

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Transformers

**Author's Note:** I recently found myself in Blurr's awkward position (not on a cliff.) I figured I may as well broadcast my misfortune.

--

Blurr considered his options, there were not very many at this point in time. He could go back down, he could let go or he could kill Springer. The last was the most appealing. This was all Springer's fault. 'The Decepticons will expect us to attack from the front, so we'll come from behind.' He made it sound so easy.

He'd mentioned the cliff face in passing. 'Won't take but a breem.' Blurr remembered him waving a hand airily. He wondered if now was the time for questions, he had some. Top of his list was 'If the cliff face won't take but a breem, why are we barely halfway after four?'

He turned his death glare off Springer and considered his predicament. His feet were up on the 'ledge' if it could be called that. This was good. His hands were also on the 'ledge'. This was not so good. It meant that while he was in no danger he couldn't go anywhere either. He couldn't move his hands or his feet and he was steadily becoming aware that his centre of gravity was currently his aft which was sticking out behind him.

He could go back down but then he'd have to find another way past this 'ledge'. He could let go and fall but it would definitely hurt although the pain was starting to look preferable to their situation. By the time they clawed the way to the top the only thing they'd be fit for would be recharge and recharging outside the Decepticon base didn't sound like a fantastic plan by any stretch of the imagination. Falling might be best. He could say he slipped.

His third option was of course to kill Springer. Shooting was good but he could hardly make it look like an accident. If he could get ahead, he could 'accidentally' slip and take Springer with him.

He realised he had to do something, he couldn't hang around there forever and even if he could, being shot at by seekers while he hung off a cliff was not on his top ten list of things to do. He could pull himself up. He was strong enough. The trouble was once he had the momentum he wouldn't be able to stop so where was he going to put his hands. He glanced back at Springer who was now dangling one handed, desperately trying to get his leg up. Well, that was how not to do it at any rate. Now, where was his next handhold.

There, it was small but it would have to do. He braced himself, leaning back, weight on his feet and pushed up with all the force he had. He grabbed wildly at his handhold and for one glorious, wonderful second he thought it had worked. Then the rock crumbled under his fingers, his shoulders swung backward and as he parted company with the wall he had an excellent view of the ground which was far too far for comfort. He swung his arms wildly as his legs overtook his head and managed to grab something. He heard the squawk of surprise and looked up to find it was Springer's leg he had hold of. His luck wasn't all bad, if he was going Springer was coming too.

He felt a slight slipping sensation. Springer was yelling for him to let go but he was damned if he was gonna do that. He'd just say he panicked and hadn't been thinking straight. He looked up in time to see Springer's fingers slide off the edge. The expressions on the other's faces would have been funny under other circumstances.

He hit the ground. It stunned more than it hurt and lying there dazed he had time to be surprised that Springer hadn't transformed, though it would blow their cover, even the Decepticons would be bound to notice a helicopter flying around outside their back window. It also occured to him that perhaps he should move but that thought came too late. Springer hit him like two and a half tonnes of metal and Primus, did it hurt.

He woke up in the medbay to Ratchet's glaring face which was a worrying enough sight on its own. However while glancing around for an escape route, he met the optics of Springer on the next berth. His glare matched Ratchet's. Blurr cringed. Ratchet was probably the safest bet. He might ding him up a little but he probably wouldn't really hurt him. He'd never hurt a patient yet. Springer though... he slid his optics back to the side and quickly made up his mind.

He was on his feet in an instant, pushing the surprised Ratchet aside. He raced across the room into Ratchet's office, upended the desk sending various objects skittering across the floor and barricaded the door with it. He turned around panting slightly and stared at First Aid who was to be fair, staring at him. His hands were poised above where seconds ago there had been a desk and he looked understandably startled. He closed his mouth in preparation to speak and Blurr launched himself across the room and grabbed his shoulders.

"Saveme!They'regonnaterminateme!Please,you'vegottahelpme!Helpme!"

"Uh, what?"

"Them!" Blurr pointed dramatically to the window.

First Aid stared out. Ratchet and Springer stared in. The former glowered, the latter had lost his glare in favour of open mouthed shock.

"GET OUT HERE. NOW!" Ratchet bellowed.

Blurr whimpered and cowered behind First Aid. "TellthemI'mnotcomingout."

"Uh, what?" First Aid could feel logic chips straining. He tried to turn around but Blurr had a death grip on his hips and pushed him forward.

"Tellthem!"

"Uh" Ratchet turned his glare on him. First Aid wondered if he could get behind Blurr. "Uh, he says he's not coming out."

"Why?" First Aid had heard that mammals frothed at the mouth when very angry. He could almost see it on Ratchet.

"Uh, why won't you go out?"

"They'regoingtokillme!"

"Ratchet wouldn't kill you, you know that. He won't let Springer kill you either." In fact Springer no longer looked murderous, just half astounded, half amused. It was a very strange expression that First Aid wouldn't mind examining in detail, some other time.

"I'mnotgoingoutwhilethey'rethere!"

"Ratchet's not gonna let you go until he clears you."

"You'reamedic.Youcanclearme."

First Aid relayed this to Ratchet whose howl of fury was heard throughout the Ark. Prowl thought Wheeljack had blown up his lab again. Needless to say this demonstration of ire did not encourage Blurr to leave the office. It didn't do much for First Aid either, Springer said the sight of the two of them trying to get under the same chair was the funniest thing he had ever seen.

--

Glad you liked SunnyXBlurr. Been trying to get Sunstreaker in a fic for ages. The fragger wouldn't cooperate. But I finally managed to sneak up on him so all's good.

RWG: Yeah, you caught me. The reason I wasn't capitalising Decpeticons/Autobots (a) I wasn't sure whether I should and (b) I was being lazy. So now I know and now I shall. As for requests I take them. Anything which means I don't have to come up with an idea from scratch is good. The only thing I don't do is humanXmech otherwise anything goes.


	26. Betrayed Blurr

**Disclaimer:** Transformers belongs to Hasbro and other people with money. Not me. No Autobots were harmed during the writing of this fic, although they may have been permanently traumatised. This is regrettable.

**Warning: **Slash, parody

**Author's Note:** (crawls out of hiding) Sorry I haven't updated for a while. I have reasons I promise you. This isn't the one I've been working on for three weeks but that one has decided it needs a new ending. So you get this instead (spit, polish, shove.) As I said above it is a parody so do not take it seriously because you'll get no sympathy here. Slash is at the end, don't like it stop reading there. Thanks for the reviews. (bright smile) Enjoy.

--

Optimus faced his senior officers. They were not happy and he was in complete agreement with them. The situation was intolerable he just wished there was another way.

"Are you sure we couldn't try..."

"NO!"

He stared at their resolute faces, sensing he was about to give in, Ratchet growled.

"Fine, fine. I'll do it. I'll do it. Just leave me alone while I talk to the representatives."

They filed out slowly, glaring over their shoulders as they went.

Alone in his office, Optimus felt very small. He summoned his courage, shrank in on himself and made the call.

Optimus watched his mechs file in. He had summoned them all to an empty storage room, the only one big enough to hold them all. He was not looking forward to this. He had been Prime for millions of years. He had sent more mechs on suicide missions than he dared to recall. But this, this was a betrayal of the highest order. He wondered if they would ever forgive him. He wondered if he would ever forgive himself. He watched as his accomplices filed in last. Nobody noticed. Nobody had any reason to suspect.

"My Autobots" he began "I consider you my friends, even my family, as I hope you consider myself and each other. I have always encouraged fairness as you know. I have always tried my best not to single out any mech or group of mechs above another but I'm afraid a situation has arisen that is extremely unfair."

"Myself and the other individuals involved.." He gestured to the exits. The crowd looked round and saw his accomplices, nervous muttering and fidgeting began. Optimus waited until they calmed down and continued. "Myself and the others feel that we have no choice but to this."

"Do what?"

HotRod. It would be HotRod. Optimus glared at him and avoided the question. "As you all know, myself and the others have come to the attention of a sub sect of humans. This sub sect has left the rest of you largely alone. We want this to change."

There was outright panic in the muttering now. "We have decided to draw names out of this box to be our slash pairing of the week. We are terribly sorry but we just can't take it anymore. If I have to frag Megatron one more time..."

This last went unheard as the crowd made a desperate rush for the exits. They were blocked. His accomplices had done their job well. The terrified crowd found themselves facing a weapons primed Ironhide, a smirking Sideswipe and a murderous Ratchet and Sunstreaker, backed up by Jazz, Prowl, Bumblebee, Wheeljack, Red Alert, Inferno, Bluestreak, Hound, Trailbreaker, Mirage and the Aerialbots. They were all determined. No one would leave. The crowd turned back to Optimus who plastered a hideously fake smile on his face, which was thankfully hidden by his mask and with a shaking voice spoke.

"I'll just call forth our independent observers chosen at random from a hoard of slavering fangirls." He beckoned and from the shadows they came, groaning, lurching, glassy eyed, hands reaching blindly before them.

"Right then" he said with hysterical cheerfulness "we'll get our first pair."

He reached into the box. Every optic was on him. Everyone hoping, praying it wouldn't be them.

"Blurr and Grapple."

"NOOOO! AAAARGH!"

The screams were ridiculously high pitched and would have sounded better on a femme. Both mechs turned and tried to run but were stopped by their relieved fellows. Slowly, they were pushed forward.

"Blurr, Grapple." Optimus placed a hand on each of their shoulders. Both mechs stopped struggling, turning wide, pleading optics up to Optimus. He ignored them, he'd meant what he said. He just couldn't take it anymore. "If you'll just step into the specially prepared room."

A section of wall slid back revealing a spacious room with recharge berth, desk and candles, and sex toys under the bed but Optimus saw no reason to tell them that. "In you go." He said.

Neither mech moved. So Optimus did the worst thing he had done in millions of years of warfare. He shoved them forward. The slavering fangirls reached out groaning but failed to make contact. The wall slid back into place.

Optimus turned to the horror struck crowd. "Well, that's it for a week. I for one intend to get horribly overcharged and forget I was ever here. Let's go."

His accomplices stepped away from the exits and there was a stampede down the hall. Optimus took one last look at the wall and the slavering fangirls who were stroking it, making strange cooing noises. He shuddered and went for his high grade.

Behind the wall...

As soon as the wall slid back into place, Grapple and Blurr's processors went curiously blank. After a moment, text scrolled across their HUD's. -You turn to each other with lust in you optics. You reach out...-

Blurr felt hands sliding over his armour. He mirrored the action, sliding his hands between the seams, hoping for reciprocation. He reached down the sides for that sensitive wire that every mech had. He tweaked it. Grapple gasped, moaned and nuzzled into Blurr's neck, licking and nipping at the wires there. Blurr groaned, his spark pulsing faster. He pushed Grapple onto the floor hard enough to dent and climbed slowly up his chassis, smirking before diving in for the kiss.

Grapple pulled Blurr closer, running his hands over his back, then reaching under his pelvic armour for the sensitive circuits there. Blurr growled and pulled his head back, looked down at Grapple momentarily, then slid back down his chassis and lowered his mouth to his crotch plate. Grapple arched back, crying out loudly then pulled Blurr back up and rolled him over. Hands and mouths roved wildly then, till with a collective groan they overloaded and collapsed.

They would wake screaming. Their howls of horror would echo throughout the base and the sound of their fleeing footsteps would linger for minutes as they ran in opposite directions. The rest of the Autobots would cower in their rooms unable to face these mechs they had so easily betrayed. They had however left enough high grade that when they returned from wherever they fled, they could get hideously overcharged and forget all about it. Until next week that is.


	27. Caring Blurr

**Disclaimer : **If I owned Transformers I 'd have them demolish my office. It's still there and I still don't own Transformers

**Warning: **Mild war/death

**Author's Note: **I've been working on this one for a month, trying to come up with an ending. The one I've finally come up with is a bit lame and I apologise for that. I think these story type one's are my weak point and I'd appreciate any feedback you could give me to tell me how I could improve. I've given my OC a crap name but it's better than what I call it in my head which is Plot Device. Blurr's behaviour towards Plot Device might seem a bit off but he does seem to have a bit of a problem with social interactions. I'll shut up now. Enjoy.

--

The dust was thick, full of particles, clogging his intakes, creeping through every gap in his armour, in his gears and circuits, everywhere. He ran his diagnostic and came back green so he risked movement. There was stuff on top of him but it fell off easy. Metal shards and panels screeching when they hit the ground. He raised his head up but the dust was too thick to see through. He switched to infrared, jumping slightly as the world flared to colour.

Judging by the state of the building, he'd been right to come in here. The front had collapsed in on itself, beams and girders thrown haphazardly across each other. He wasn't getting out easily but at least he was alive.

He didn't dare stand up so he crawled gingerly to the largest gap in the debris. He was pretty sure he could squeeze through it, if not, he'd come up with another plan once he got there.

There was a deactivated femme in the way. It would have been quicker to go over her but he couldn't bring himself to do it. It was as he was edging past her that he heard it. A questioning squeak. Under her arm was a sparkling. Very young. He stared at it. It warbled happily and scampered over to him. It didn't seem unduly distressed.

He carried on staring as it tugged on his arm. It wanted him to go to the femme. He looked between the two and wondered exactly what he should do. He wasn't good with sparklings as he would be the first to admit. He wasn't good with social interactions period.

He looked down at the sparkling, scooped it up and told it as kindly as he could that the femme was deactivated.

It didn't understand but it wouldn't have understood anybody else either. It was just too young. It got the hint though when Blurr continued his crawl towards the exit. He winced at the sheer volume of its wails and concentrated on coming up with a way to crawl through a tiny hole with a sparkling.

After a breem of staring at the narrow gap he decided he would have to push the sparkling ahead of him. It wasn't the best idea but it was the only one he had. He made sure to keep a grip on it when he reached the other side. Keeping it as close to his body as possible while poking his head out. It looked clear. The fighting had probably moved on.

It wasn't far to the ground so he simply lowered the sparkling till it was nearly touching and dropped it, which at least shocked it into silence briefly. He pulled himself out carefully to avoid knocking anything onto the sparkling and peered around cautiously.

The fighting had definitely moved on. He could hear it somewhere on his right which meant it wasn't far enough away. So he picked up the screaming sparkling and went left.

As he picked his way over and around the rubble and bodies he examined the sparkling. It didn't appear to be damaged, a couple of scuffs and scratches that was all. He couldn't determine its gender either so he decided to refer to it as Lil' Bot, a name someone had once called him by.

"WellthenLil'Bot.That'swhatI'mgonnacallyousee,Lil'Bot.SoLil'Botyou'realrightnow.We'regoingsomewheresafenow.Howaboutyoucalmdownnowandstopcrying,huh.StopcryingforBlurr,huh.Please,prettypleasestopcrying."

He continued his cajoling, patting its back, using his sweetest voice, trying to calm it down. Apart from everything else just cos the fighting was gone didn't mean all the Decepticons were gone and if they heard the crying and found them, Blurr didn't know what he was going to do. He didn't have any weapons. His armour wasn't the best on the line and he wasn't particularly big. That left running and with all the debris on the street, he wouldn't get very far at all. So he begged and pleaded and did his best to console it but nothing worked.

After a while he surprised himself by becoming used to the wails. He'd never have believed it before. The sounds of battle were quite far away now and he was starting to think maybe he should actually decide where he was going. The Autobots seemed like the best idea. He could get out of the city by himself but that wouldn't help him get somewhere else. They were quite isolated here which had kept them safe until now and it was a long drive to the next settlement. Besides he had the sparkling. Maybe the Autobots would have a better idea what to do with it than him, because he had no idea at all.

Now that he thought about it maybe the Autobots would be good for him as well. He'd been planning on staying out of the war but obviously that wasn't going to be possible and if he was choosing sides then he knew what side he was on. Decision made, he just had to work out how to find the Autobots without going back to the fighting. He sighed and shifted the sparkling in his arms, rubbing its back and muttering some soothing nonsense.

It was an hour or so later that he stumbled onto a group of mechs. There were five of them in a huddle and it was pure luck that none of them had seen Blurr walk around the corner, stop in shock and then dive into a half collapsed building. It was also fortunate that the sparkling had tired itself out or they certainly would have heard it. Blurr was watching the mechs over a rather large hunk of machinery, hoping to see an insignia.

He wanted them to move so he could get a better look at them and at the same time was terrified they were Decepticons and would see him. He wondered if maybe, if they were Decepticons, he should say that he wanted to join them. It would work he was sure of it, he just wasn't sure about the sparkling, they had no need of a sparkling. He would have to leave it if push came to shove and he really didn't want to have to do that. The fighting was far away now and unlikely to come back this way but still, what if it wasn't found.

It was as he was dithering back and forth between decisions that one of the mechs turned enough that he could see his insignia. Indeed he was so busy dithering that he almost missed it and the Autobots had already started moving off when his optics managed to interrupt his processor and deliver their information.

So it was that the Autobots were stopped in their tracks by a wild shriek from behind and stood in stunned silence as the blue blurr coalesced into a rather frantic mech. He was probably attempting to communicate but the high pitched noise coming out of his mouth was indecipherable. They did however notice the sparkling so two of them were ordered to take them back to the Autobot's field base. Blurr had by this time managed to reign in his tongue and was babbling his tale at the two unfortunate mechs.

They made it to the base without any trouble and dumped Blurr and sparkling in the waiting line for the medic. So, Blurr thought, here he was and after the sparkling was dealt with he would enlist and become a soldier.

--

As always thanks for reviews

RWG: You told me how use a comma. Thank you, thank you, thank you. School was long ago and things like that are long forgotten. As for not liking slash, I'm actually not that keen on it myself but it grew on me. It's too hard to find good Blurr fics for me to be picky about stuff like that.


	28. Blurr: Present

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Transformers or robots of any brand. Alas, I only own myself and if anyone can do a better job with me, they're welcome to try.

**Author's Note: **Blurr as a sparkling, short and fluffy. My first attempt at fluff. Written for the Blurrfans contest on deviantart. Prompt was 'present.' The beginning comes from a completely different story I'm working on which is written in my notebook - which I've lost. My bedroom flooded and I know I saved it. I picked it up and put it somewhere safe. I can see it in my hand. What did I do with the bloody thing!? *sigh* I'll find it eventually and then you'll get another story. Might take a while, my room is well and truly fragged. Nearly forgot - thank you to reviewers and readers alike. I believe this makes chapter 28 (fervent praying. Is too lazy to check.) So I guess I could have made this 28 Blurr's after all. Every single one of you has helped me get this far. This was my first ever fanfic and I think I've improved a lot from the start but I probably would have given up ages ago if it wasn't for you lot reading it. :-) I still occasionally wonder what the hell I think I'm doing and consider scrapping the lot but a lovely review (hint, hint) always snaps me out of it. I shall continue this until I run out of ideas or someone tells me 'You ran out of ideas ages ago, please stop.' *huggles everyone* Happy reading!

--------------

Blurr lay belly down on the floor, cold metal under his chassis as his hands moved quickly, grabbing what he needed and bringing it close. Though his hands were quick, his movements were slow. This was careful work.

He frowned at the wire, choosing the best place to cut. There. He took the freshly cut wire and twisted it, wrapping it around the metal frame. The door panel beeped! He jumped and shoved everything out of sight under the recharge berth as the door slid open. Frantically, he surveyed the scene in front of him. Scrap metal and scrap wire, nothing to see there. He pushed himself to his knees and watched as his visitor entered.

Plotter smiled broadly as he came in but his smile quickly froze as he took in the guilty look on his sparklings face. "Blurr. What are you doing?" Voice stern.

"Nothing." came the quick reply.

"Nothing, huh. Doesn't look much like nothing." His optics swept the room. Nothing else was suspicious. He looked back at Blurr who smiled tentatively. He was definitely up to something but it was probably harmless and if it wasn't, well, he'd be caught out in the end, he always was. Plotter supposed at some time he would have to teach the boy to lie better. He'd never get anywhere if he continued to blurt everything out under pressure.

"Here," he held out a datapad. "I downloaded the files you needed."

"Wow, thanks" Big grin. Definitely up to something.

"I'll see you before you recharge," he shot another shrewd glance round the room before leaving.

Blurr waited impatiently till he was sure Plotter had gone then looked towards the recharge berth. Plotter suspected him. He sighed, his creator was far too paranoid, but still, he only had to hide it till tomorrow. He set the datapad down beside him, reached under the berth and pulled the tiny thing back towards him. He picked the datapad up again and scanned it quickly. Somewhere.. in... here.

Plotter frowned at the sparkling. The way it was chugging its energon he half expected it to bring it all back up. He knew it was up to something, he just had to find out what. His frown only deepened as it finished its energon and tossed the cube towards the rubbish chute with such speed that he only knew it had gone down by the screaming whistle that echoed back up the tube. He winced. He hoped it didn't hit anyone again. He really couldn't understand how it had become wedged in Atomiser's head. The idiot must have heard it coming and still he just stood there till it hit him. Plotter had only agreed to pay the medic's bill to stop the whining, personally he wished he'd paid the medic a bit more to put a few more circuits in.

He came out of his thoughts and realised Blurr was gone. He'd vaguely noticed him babbling something and shooting off towards his room. Plotter wondered exactly what Primus was playing at, gifting him with a spark like Blurr's. Plotter was careful, cautious and lived up to his name. Blurr was reckless and restless and everything he wasn't. Plotter loved him dearly but he knew he would never understand him and something told him that when Blurr was older and more capable of rationalising things, he would never understand him either.

Blurr grinned at his project. He was proud of himself, he thought he'd done quite well. He picked up the paintbrush and carefully set about the finishing touches.

Plotter was sipping his morning energon and browsing through the latest databursts when Blurr walked into the room. He was moving slowly and had his hands behind his back. Plotter narrowed his optics and waited.

Blurr sidled up to the table, looked at him sidelong, whipped his hands out in front of him and crowed, "HappyCreationDay,Creator!"

Plotter stared at the thing in front of him. He'd completely forgotten it was his creation day and he was surprised that Blurr had remembered. This was obviously his present. A tiny robot, as tall as his fingers, painted just like him. He reached out towards it and it moved. 'Halt. Who goes there?' It moved into a defensive stance.

"Doyoulikeit? It's you. I made it all by myself." Blurr's voice was happy and anxious at the same time. ""It does lots of things. I even made it imitate you." Plotter burst into laughter as the tiny robot put its hands behind its back and paced the table, muttering.

"I love it," he scooped Blurr onto his lap. "You made it by yourself?" Blurr nodded. "That's very advanced. How did you manage it?" Pride tinged his voice now.

""I looked it up at school and in the files you gave me. I wanted to make a little me that could go everywhere with you, butI'mtoocomplicated."

"I like little me." Plotter proclaimed. "I shall take it to my office to remind myself not to take myself too seriously," he kissed the top of Blurr's head. "Thank you, sweetling."

------

**Ps: **This site's been eating my dialogue again so I've had to put spaces between some (most of) Blurr's words. Very irritating. I've been checking some of the stuff I posted before and I've realised it's happened quite a lot and I haven't noticed. When I get time I'll go back and correct them all. *is irritated*


	29. Blurr: Relaxation

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Transformers

**Author's note: **Written for a contest on DA with the theme _relaxation._ I think I've failed slightly to hit the theme here, nevermind. I'm not too sure about the paragraph spacing here and my knowledge of aircraft and hovercraft could be spelled out in ten one syllable words, please feel free to point out to me anything you feel could be improved upon. I would like to thank all my readers and reviewers for their support. Enjoy.

-------

Blurr drove along the road. He loved days like this. Nowhere to go, nothing to do, he could just drive around all day with the wind on his chassis. He loved the feel of the road beneath him. It was always there, just below the air that held him aloft and he could feel it as it both attracted him and repelled him.

He remembered once, when the war had first started, they had wanted him to become a flier. He had refused. Adamantly, and eventually, they had backed down. He was a hovercar. Why would he want to fly? There wasn't any point to it. The ground was there but it didn't hold him back, why leave it behind? He could listen to Powerglide wax lyrical on the benefits of flying long after everyone else had got bored and left. It was meaningless to him.

'Oh, the wind over and under you,' Powerglide said. Yeah. And... Blurr had that already. It was under and over and all around, slipping in between the seams of his armour. The wind down here had more flavour than the wind up there as far as Blurr was concerned. Up in the sky the wind was always cold, down on the ground it didn't have to be cold. It could be hot or cold or anything in between. It had variety. The same could be said of the terrain.

Up there it was turbulent or calm, down here every single mile was different. There was traffic and potholes and hills. Challenges! What was up there? Blue skies as far as the optic can see. _Bor_-ing. Here was better. '

When gravity lets you go,' said Powerglide. Blurr didn't want gravity to let him go. He liked gravity. He liked the fight against it. He liked the feel of it on his undercarriage trying to drag him down. No, Blurr had never wanted to fly. He knew that if the war had never come, he would never have left the ground. He was built to hug the earth. So on his free days he liked to drive and feel the wind caressing him as gravity tried and failed to pull him down though sometimes he did wonder, if gravity released its hold on him, how fast could he go?

-------

**P.S.** I've got another chapter written, dark and depressing I'm afraid. I'll post it at the weekend when I will also, finally, sort out the missing dialogue in previous chapters. I'm hoping it doesn't reload on the front page with every edit but we'll have to wait and see. Anyways, there will defo be another chapter by Tuesday at the latest. Dsai jian


End file.
